The Lundberg Company

By Darla Isackson, Meridian Magazine Writer

“We have the whole evening to do whatever you choose. What do you want to do?” My friend asked her grandson, Derrick.

“I want to watch videos or go to a movie,” he replied.

Today’s children are following the example of many adults to become watchers instead of doers, consumers instead of creators, observers instead of active participants. Preschoolers spend roughly one-third of their waking time watching television. As we saunter into summer, here are some things to be aware of.

Things Children Aren’t Doing When They Are Only Watching

In the book Meeting the Challenge by Jim Fay, Goster W. Cline, M.D. And Bob Sornson, pediatrician John Rosemond notes the things a child is not doing when he is watching TV or videos:

• Scanning
• Practicing motor skills, gross or fine
• Practicing eye-hand coordination
• Using more than two senses
• Asking questions
• Exploring
• Exercising initiative or motivation
• Being challenged
• Solving problems
• Thinking analytically
• Exercising imagination
• Practicing communication skills
• Being either creative or constructive

At an essential time of brain developmental readiness for task mastery, today’s three- and four-year-olds are spending much of their time glued to a screen. This is the age children who in the 1950s Erik H. Erickson characterized as being at the stage of initiative and industry (Erik H. Erickson, Childhood and Society — second edition (Norton) “Eight Stages of Man”)

And therein lies the basic problem. Instead of exercising initiative and industry, our children today are encouraged to watch instead of do. “In fact, reflecting the television and video game generation, most of the items for younger children in Toys “R” Us or any toy outlet emphasize sensory input and rudimentary motor skills, but rarely encourage creativity, task focus, job completion or mastery. Even if they are offered for sale, Tinkertoys, Legos, Lincoln Logs, and alphabet blocks are not the big sellers. What sells big are video tapes and video games“ (Meeting the Challenge, p. 62).

What Has Changed and What Has Not

Have children changed in their basic needs? Have parents changed in their desire to encourage the total development of the child?

Not at all. However, parents and grandparents are just as likely to be caught up in the “watching” instead of “doing” mode as are the children. Today when parents “do’” something with small children, it seldom involves really “doing” anything at all. Parents are most likely to suggest they watch TV together, go and watch a game, go and watch a movie, or go to the zoo and watch the animals. They rarely sit down and create or produce or create something with their small children.

Instead of singing, they watch others sing. Instead of making up stories, they watch or listen to stories someone else made up. Instead of figuring out how to do something and developing a new skill they watch someone else perform. Parents have a relatively few precious hours to teach, train, and encourage the development of children’s minds and hearts. Yet in today’s society, during those hours, shared focus on a mutual task may not take place at all.

Have We Forgotten?

In a “watching” society, we may have forgotten what children did before all these TV and video screens and organized sports and entertainments were available. Maybe we need some reminders of what to encourage our little children and grandchildren to “do.”

When I was little we entertained ourselves by cutting out paper dolls and dressing them with tabbed clothing. We made corncob and hollyhock dolls and mud pies, played “store” with empty cans and play money. We sewed buttons on a cloth in any pattern we chose, or hand cut and sewed rough but original doll clothes. We climbed trees, hid in tree houses, made up games — indoors and out. I liked to make up stories and create sound effects for them — like thunder or footsteps or fairy dancing — on the piano. I loved to read books and color pictures and dance with scarves to music on the record player.

“Doing” Ideas

Here are “doing” ideas from lists I made when my children were young:

• Cut pictures from catalogs and magazines and paste into collages, favorite things books, or ABC books (find things that start with each letter of the alphabet).
• Paint pictures or posters, color in color books, sculpt with clay or play dough.
• Build with blocks, Legos, Construxs, or other building toys.
• Put together costumes and play make believe. Be a doctor, a dentist, a cowboy, a barber, a dancer, a sports hero or super hero.
• Play camping and sleep in sleeping bags under the stars in the back yard, in a tent, or in the family room. In winter have a picnic on a blanket on the family room floor.
• Put together puzzles or make puzzles by gluing a picture to light cardboard and cutting it into fun-shaped pieces.
• Do an experiment — books to suggest experiments are easy to find at the library. Experiments are fun!
• Read stories or have someone read to you.
• Find an easy recipe you’d like and make a treat for family and friends.
• Plan a family home evening lesson or prepare your assigned part.
• Learn to sew on the sewing machine.
• Write your best memories in your journal.
• Write a letter or thank you (now it may be an e-mail) to grandparents.
• Practice music, learn to lead music.
• Work with flash cards to learn spelling words, music, times tables, or other memorization items.
• Play card games or board games. Play word games. Play games that teach colors, ABC, numbers, shapes and sizes, professions, and so on.
• Deliver treats to neighbors or shut-ins or go with Mom to retirement home to visit an elderly person who is lonely.
• Pick a new arts and crafts project and learn how to do it.
• Write stories or poems (younger children may dictate while Mom writes).

The Worth of “Doing” Work

In addition to “playing” kinds of “doing” children need to be involved in lots of “working” kinds of “doing.” Helping Mom and Dad with household chores is the training ground for adult living. Competency is such an important part of a child’s self-concept. Every time a child masters an essential life skill a brick is laid for a solid foundation for his life.

Read the rest of this article at Meridian Magazine.